Tranqualized Dreams

These dreams could have you losing all forms of basic motor skills. Becoming disconnected from reality, you could become psychologically disconnected to the one that controls you. Not being able to walk without looking and feeling awkward because that’s exactly what you are. This tranquil feeling from something that could bring an animal down.

Start hearing the water running through the pipes behind the walls. Your vision could possibly become a lot clearer almost high-definition, with every little pixel popping out at you.

In the middle of a conversation and forgetting what was just said. Having extreme difficulty comprehending the simplest of problems. Those problems are elementary to the ones that you can come across when you lay down and close your eyes. It doesn’t seem to stop there it’s really only the beginning.

These dreams can make you feel so awkward and weird because that’s exactly what you are.

Random Rant So I dont lose my mind

I really would love to tell you that the things you’ve recently heard about, with regards to talking shut about you was true. It’s just not possible because those things are false and based off of someone’s imagination. In no way has your name and/or business come out of my mouth, nor will it ever, regardless of whether it’s positive or negative. It’s not who I am or who I want to be. You and what you do is none of my business. I mind my own business, but obviously others haven’t learned to do that.

As annoying as this is especially hearing it in the morning after just waking up, there really is no surprise, because people like to gossip and apparently making up false stories based off of nothing is another hobby of people these days. For what reasons? I have no idea my best guess is that it comes down to them being bored and having nothing half way intelligent or remotely interesting to talk about. Or they simply just enjoy making a mess with the week old garbage that is the lies that come out of their mouth. A mess that they have no intentions of cleaning up.

Given the timeframe in which you heard these false rumors, I can pinpoint it to a few and rule out a few others. However I’m not going to put any energy into trying to find out who it is, because everyone is going to lie. Plus, I don’t need to hear someone admit it, all it takes is looking at someone. As most know the majority of communication between two people is non verbal and the eyes don’t lie

I know what I said and didn’t say and in this case I didn’t say shit. Not saying anything is exactly what I’m going to do unless it has something to do with what we’re doing and where we are at.  Other than that I’ve got nothing to say to the people I see on a daily basis. Help them if they wonder and ask why I’ve become so distant and quiet, because I’d probably lose my shit and say thing’s that even I would think are a little messed up. Things that would make someone cry and bring them down, but that’s not what I’m about. I’m about good vibes and good times while we’re here together. So I’ll just remain silent and keep them guessing. One could only hope that while we’re here,

we are working together and not against one another, but obviously that’s not the case since rumors are being made up and thrown up like moldy bread.

In the words of one of my favorite musicians: ” You’re in high school again, No recess”

Yes, that’s exactly how it feels, quite sad but true.

Everything in Between

There seems to be so much hate, anger, disappointment, disgust and everything in between when it come’s to how you feel about him. It may not be all of the time but it has happened many times. So many times now that he’s lost track and stopped counting. It’s as if he’s worthless to you.

When you have or have had any or all of those feelings towards him, it’s always to the fullest extent. There has never been any form of communication when you get these feelings, it always becomes a screaming match. A screaming match that’s usually one side, because he doesn’t believe in that type of uncivilized conversation. It doesn’t do any good and just pushes him even further away. So far away that he becomes completely scared to even make an attempt at getting in touch with you in hopes of talking, but he knows that the conversation isn’t going to be the way he want’s it to be.

No matter what he says you never believe him and it get’s to the point where he starts asking himself, “what’s the point?”

What’s the point in him trying to explain a situation or clarify something that may be going on. It always seems like you jump to conclusions and respond out of anger, instead of talking after you’ve calmed down.

When he makes a mistake, just like anyone and everyone else including you, he can never go and talk to you about it. He’s never been comfortable with doing that. Fearing that he would be looked down upon, or thought of as less of a person. Those are two thing’s he’s never done to you. He would always be willing to listen and possibly give some advice, but it was as if because of his mistakes he’s made that he must not be helpful in any way. And can’t do anything for you, though he’s willing to lend a helping hand. He’s got the great ability to listen and understand things from both sides of the story. With that he is able to not pass any judgement and he feels he will be judged by you, no matter what the circumstances may be. He understands why you may have the feelings that you have. He has always understood and can see thing’s from your perspective. Yet, seeing things from his perspective is something you’ve never been able to do. And he’s never understood that at all.

You always seem to hold onto these feelings of hate, anger, disappointment, disgust and everything in between for so long. Will you ever truly learn how to let go and find someway to make peace with him?

All he’s ever wanted was for you to be happy. He’s wanted you to live a fulfilling life filled with happiness and joy. Where you’ll be able to pursue your dreams. Maybe he want’s too much for you, considering you don’t seem to want that for him. Maybe what you want for him is to stay way from you and stay away for a long time. If that’s the case than he will do just that. You can hold onto a grudge for as long as you may want, but he never will. He’s not mad at you and will answer if a phone call from you come’s his way, even though you’ve had him on the floor sick to his stomach with tears rolling down his face.

He always feels like less of a person in your eyes, especially when those feelings of hate, anger, disappointment, disgust and everything in between are running through you towards him. Those feelings don’t even have to be there for him to feel less in your eyes. It’s kind of hard to not feel that way when someone so close is so far away.

In some ways very much alike yet two completely different people, with two very different personalities.

Being so far away may be the best thing for both, until the feelings of hate, anger, disappointment, disgust and everything in between dissipate. For right now he’s got to let go and go. Because all of those feelings that you have towards him, he has had those same feelings about himself and the last thing he needs is to be reminded by you of those feelings. He’s moving forward and doesn’t need his past to be brought up. Before any fingers are pointed by you or others he suggests that they be examined very closely, while looking in the mirror asking yourself, “what’s the point in having these feelings of hate, anger, disappointment, disgust and everything in between?

All they are is self-defeating and that’s the last thing he want’s to feel. Whats the point in letting someone else make you feel like that? There is no point, just like there is no point in him trying to make your feelings about him go away, so he will just go away.

Weird and Dumb

Being called weird is something that has no real effect on me. I’ve heard it many times and many more times to come, where I’ll hear this. I love when people call me we weird, because it just makes me laugh. I laugh because I think what is it that makes me weird? Is it some of the thing’s that I say, that make people call me weird or even dumb?

The things that I say or do that causes people to think and say these things about me, are in a complete joking manner. They’re in a joking manner because the place that these incident’s occur the most are at a place where people should learn to relax and have a little bit of fun. Being miserable all day while you’re here isn’t going to help.

The one’s that have said this the most are the one’s who have never sat down and had a real conversation with me and quite frankly I don’t personally care to ever have a conversation with someone who may call another person weird or dumb. Especially when I’m called that when I’m only trying to make you laugh and smile a little bit.

What’s weird or dumb about making someone laugh?

Is it because I’m different that makes me weird or dumb according to you?

I’d rather be different from you or the next person, because being the same as the rest, is the weirdest and dumbest thing, but hey that’s just my opinion. An opinion just like when you say I’m weird or dumb is just your opinion and you’re entitled to it. Now, please tell me why am I weird?

Story Of Songs (ReMix/Continued)

In these “Perfect Blue Buildings”, sitting here talking to “Mr.Jones”, whose trying to shove “Lithium” down my throat as if it were “Pennyroyal Tea.”

Has got me feeling like a “Creep”, hopefully I’m rescued by the “Karma Police”, but it will make me look like a “Freak On a Leash.”

They all think I’m “Dumb”, but all I need is a “Soul to Squeeze”, hoping it will bring me to the “Otherside”, where I’ll be able to see “Polly”,but their seems to be “Something In the Way.”

“It’ll be a Long Time”, until my “Self Esteem” come’s back because “The Kid’s Aren’t Alright.”

At this point everything seems so damn “Blurry” especially since we have to talk “Through The Glass.” It tends to make me “Feel So Numb.” All the pain subsides when I know “You Know You’re Right.”

Can’t wait until your “By My Side”, until than I’ll be right there with a “Smoking Gun”, let that be a “Warning” to those with “All Eyes On Me” because I’ve got “My Mind Made Up.”

Finally reaching “The Point of No Return” where an “Aneurysm” is about to occur, all because the system is about to “Rape Me”

It’s time for everyone to “Get Ready” and realize we’ve only got one life to live, and up to this point it’s been nothing short of a “Beautiful Disaster.”

Come one, come all, “Come as You Are”, so we can all take a swim in the “Lake of Fire.”

Don’t be afraid because “They Don’t Care About Us” which come’s as no surprise because no one seems to know “The Man Who Sold the World” anymore.

Most seem to obey the “Master of Puppets” instead of doing what they truly want to do.

Now go ahead and swallow some “Purple Pills” while sitting there watching “Three Little Birds”, just because “It’s Been Awhile.” It will not make you a “Criminal” you may just become an “American Psycho.”

No need for fear we’ll be “Jamming” together while getting f*****g weird, because we as human’s are nothing but animals, so give us our “Animal Rights”, and allow us all to “Come Together.” And please “Give My Regards” to “Eleanor Rigby” as well as the “Living Dead Girl”, because were going “To fight for our Right to Party”, even if it’s with just “Three Emcees and one Dj.”

No matter what happens I’ll always “Hold You Down” because “Nothing Else Matters.”

They say their sending me out to “Omaha” because supposedly I’m “Addicted” and I need “Help”, because “What I Got” has always been acquired the “Wrong Way”, with “All Apologies” to “Ms.Jackson.” At least I’m not the one dropping “Bomb’s Over Baghdad” killing a bunch of “Obnoxious” people. Instead they should be dropping bomb’s down on an “American Girl.” However chances are that would most likely cause people to have a psychotic “Breakdown.”

If that happens all you should do is “Start From Scratch” and realize there’s no more “Running” from your “Dreams.”

The way of the world has become “Unbelievable”, many of us running around with “Suicidal Thought’s”, just ask my best friend “Jeremy.”

If you ask him “Who Shot Ya”, he’d say himself only if he could reply, now you can find him “Under The Bridge” in upstate New York, just going in and out with “The Tide.” His life was always like a game of chess, constantly in and out of a “Checkmate.”

When I walk “All Along the Watchtower”, I try to give him “All of My Love”, but I only have a few moments left now because ” I Hear My Train A Coming.”

The conductor happens to be a “Friend of Mine” and it’s going to be “XXXplosive.” Once we have reached the “Buffalo Soldier” we will sit back relax, and “Smoke Two Joints”, while drinking some “Gin and Juice”, while we plant our “Seed.”

After sometime we’ll be taking “Hits from the Bong”, it’s all apart of this “Glamour Life”, that is usually not so glamorous and it’s all the “Same in the End”, most just end up in a “Crack House” if you don’t know “What it’s Like”, don’t worry we all just “Gotta Get Away” from ourselves.

This “Manic Depression” has got me feeling “Higher” than ever before. I try to “Imagine” a world where a mother doesn’t decide that it’s more important to stick a heroin filled needle in her arm, instead of sticking a bottle in her child’s mouth. You must know theirs a million other way’s to “Express Yourself.”

I suggest you “Learn to Fly”, straight into the depth’s of hell, just make sure you have replaced your head with a cross covered in “One Blood” cell that’s (House In Virginia) infested, because I’m pretty sure your thinking I’m “Losing My Religion,” but you can’t lose something you never had.

Yes, if you must know that was “About A Girl”, now that she’s gone, I’m up on a “Plateau”, being tracked “Everywhere I Go.”

Please “Don’t Cry”, until you’ve had a blast of this “Nitro Energy.” For myself it makes me become “My Own Worst Enemy.” Never once made it to “School” on time, I was too busy killing all the “Zombies”, afterwards I eventually made it to school high.

Always listening to the teachers before I became “The Man in the Box”, never wanted to be the “Monkey Wrench” that would be talked about when I wasn’t around. Please don’t watch me “Til I Collapse” for I may “Relapse” and end up with nothing but this “Heart-Shaped Box” filled with nothing but “Sex, Love, and Money.” That’s all great but I become “Numb” and “My Friends” never “Let Me Ride.” Which is fine with me because every single one of them is a “Negative Creep”, when I’m not stoned, and it’s quite simple all we have to do is “Breathe” and have the “Time of your Life.”

Once we come down we all “Float On”, because the “Chemicals Between Us”, are “All Mixed Up”, since there’s “No Rest for the Wicked.”

All I want to do is hop into the next Cypher and try to “Save the Population”, only it has to wait because “Annie Want’s A Baby.” Sadly though she’s been touched by “Many Men” and has come down with the “Sickness”, and spends her days screaming “I need A Doctor.” Unfortunately for her he’s in no hurry so please go to “Sleep Now in the Fire.” The only way to escape is to grab your “Little Wing” and make your way to the “Castle’s Made of Sand.” On your way make sure you stop and talk to the “Joker” he’s chilling with the “Band on the Run.”

It’s highly recommended because “This is the Place” where I’ve been “Dosed”, while waiting for “The Next Episode” but I’m about to “Throw Away Your Television.” Remember “Back in the Day” in “1979” back before you had “Little Sister”, when we always had “One More Chance” where we could run through “Strawberry Fields”, to escape the “Rambling Man” who always tried to “Hypnotize” us. With only “One Minute” to spare before our lives became “Cumbersome.”

“By the Way” did I mention “I’m Shady”, if you don’t like it just remember it’s “Nothing but Music.” Plus, I love “The Way I am” and no amount of “Purple Haze” can make me feel any different. So let’s head down to the “Jailhouse” to set them free along the way we could grab some “Scarlet Begonias” that grow in “The Middle” of “Shakedown Street.” At this point of the trip there will be “No sleep til Brooklyn.”

Lets just “Make the Music” until we reach this “Parallel Universe.” Maybe we’ll be able to find the “Mississippi Queen” and if we have to wait we’ll scream “F**k the Police”, because “I Shot the Sheriff.”

It’s okay for you to “Cry Now”, just understand “Breaking Old Habits” is a lot harder than one might think, especially when you love to do, what you’re told not to do.

You have a choice you can sit there “As the World Turns” or you can “Get Up, Stand Up”, before the “Gravedigger” come’s and takes it all away. So your best bet is to just “Give it Away.”

Now the time has come where we “Serve the Servants” it’s only “3am” and they deserve it. The fields are now “In Bloom” so let’s hurry because I feel as though “Frances Farmer Will Have Her Revenge on Seattle” at any given moment.

It’s almost as if we have become “Too Close”, it does make me feel “Alive” but there is absolutely “No Love”, don’t get me wrong I’d love to “Cross that Line” but it usually leads to “Breaking the Girl”, where I end up telling her to “Suck My Kiss.” Instead of asking “Where the Cash at” ask “Where is the Love”, I don’t mind looking I only have to make it through this “Crosstown Traffic”, pass the “Pawnshop”, where “My hero” and I will get out of “The City”, a city where they won’t hesitate to “Kick in the Door” with the AR-15, while I’m starting to “Shine.” I only hope you can “Still Feel Me” when standing next to the “Fire.”

“Times Up” for me, living “Round Here” “In these Streets” has taught me that it always “Smells like Teen Spirit”, while laying next to her, when I’m not I ask “Where Did You Sleep Last Night.”

Now my “Radio Friendly Unit Shifter” has become “Some kind of Monster” and is “Killing me Softly with his Song” it has me wondering “If I was President”, would I still be “High All The Time.”

“Hate it or Love it”, but yes, because I would be under “Too Much” pressure. That would make anyone “Go Crazy”, trying to be politically correct, we all have that “Animal Instinct”, and that’s ok, because when I look at the “Man in the Mirror”, I realize it’s “All I have in this World.”

So again I wonder “If I was President”, would I become “Americas Nightmare”? No, because “Behind Blue Eyes” we are “Americas Nightmare” already, where most “Got it Twisted” and everyone’s “Outta Control.” I’m about “One Step Closer” to packing up and heading down south “Just to Get High”, along the way we may “Meet Virginia”, even if we have to go out into the darkness with “One Headlight”, but don’t worry “Help is on the Way.”

If for some reason the help does not arrive it’s ok because, we’ll “Fight Like a Brave”, when “Shit hits the Fan” and that’s inevitable because “Time and Time Again” we find ourselves caught up in this “Game of Love”, where we just get the “Run Around” and end up falling “All Over You” while turning a blind eye to the fact we have all become “Dazed and Confused”, with the “Sunshine” that you’re smile projects onto the world, lighting up even some of the darkest times while I’m “Crawling in the Dark.” The whole time looking at me like “I am Not a Human Being.”

You seem to be stuck in your “Evil Ways”, and all I want is to “Come Out and Play”, with you and “Scream” while I “Crack A Bottle” over you’re head.

Than I stop and think is this all “Just A Memory”, a memory that could be erased with a little bit of “Pussy Liquor.” Still I rise so “Let’s Go Get Stoned”, and take it “One day at a Time”, that seems like the only logical way to live, forget about time, just “Don’t Forget Me”, only make time for yourself and what you hold near and dear to you.

“Don’t Get Carried Away” with all the nonsense that goes on around you just “Spark Another Owl” and become the “Blunt Blowing” monster while your on your “California Vacation.”

Out there I feel like a complete “Loser”, I just want to be in “Beverly Hills” amongst all the “Beautiful People”, but I guess you can’t always get “Everything You Want”, than I end up feeling “Dead and Bloated.”

The “Hook” always gets you fighting, hoping that you don’t get caught up in the “Spider Webs” in the middle of a “Quiet Storm.” If that’s the case it looks like “I’m Supposed to Die Tonight” all I have to do to avoid that is “Disarm” him, and hope that the “Lighting Crashes” into the ground opening up a black hole with the “Stairway to Heaven”, that has been promised, I think I’d rather “Stay Away.” You can join if you’d like I’m headed to “Higher Ground”, going to hide “Behind the Sun.”

Can’t you see “How far we’ve come.” We’ve been “Selling the Drama”, so now “I want to Hold Your Hand”, because “All I need is Your Love.”

“Once I had a Woman”, with a “Bleeding Heart” who lived in a “Red House”, after awhile of eating “Mexican Seafood” every night she got tired so she up and left. Plus, she heard a rumor about me kissing “Molly’s Lips”, however she never knew which one’s I was kissing.

Now I’ve learned that I “Cant Repeat”, and “All I Want” is you “Want You Bad”. Every time I try to say something it’s as if I have “Tourette’s” and I need to learn how to “Take it Easy”, or else there will be a “Price to Pay” according to my “Brother John”, whose looking to expose “My Dirty Little Secret”, which happens to be you, and I won’t let anyone “Testify” against you because “Catholic School Girls Rule.”

With that said, I think it’s time we escape this world like we did on “April 26th,1992″, when we had no single care in the world, and we didn’t have this thing called “Tainted Love.”

In this world full of hypocritical bullshit there’s not much to do besides “Lose Yourself” in the moment of whatever because it feels so damn good, and who doesn’t want to feel good?

With you feet in the “Wet Sand” “Down in a Hole”, it’s becoming very “Hard to Concentrate”, on why these “Scar’s” even exist to begin with.

All I know, never let anyone get the “Best Of You”, it end’s up becoming a “Tearjerker”, just like the time you fell in love with “Runaround Sue”, that’s when you noticed “Two footprints in the Sand.”

However they didn’t belong to who you think they belonged to. They belonged to “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds”, whose singing along to the beat “While my Guitar Gently Weeps.”

I can take you “Around the World” it’s up to you, it’s “Your Decision.”

I’ll just sit here “Like a Stone” trying to figure out why everything has gone “Black”, there’s really no point in “Saving Me”, I’m sick of the “Real World.”

Let’s just go get “Breakfast at Tiffany’s” in the middle of the night, than disappear, “Into the Night”, there’s an “Open Invitation” for you “Somewhere in Heaven” so “Hold On”, it’s not going to be a “Smooth” ride, than again most things that are fun, consists of up and down’s.

“Everybody’s Everything”, if we all just tried a little harder to “Make Somebody Happy”, than we could possibly know what real peace is in this world, with all the people and an “Opinion” for each one of them, it will be tough but not impossible.

We’re here but “She’s Not There”, so just take “The Good, the bad, and the Ugly” for what it is, take a “Dive”. “If you Want Me to Stay” here down on “Sullivan Street”, help me because it’s “Raining In Baltimore” and that scares me more than the “Ghost Train” that’s headed straight towards me, while I’m working on the “Chain Gang.”

I was told to “Never Let You Go”, I think it’s time for you to “Pinch Me”, so don’t fight the feeling just “Go with the Flow.”

“For what it’s Worth” I love being “Stuck in the Middle with You” I just wanted to let you know that before this “Bullet with Butterfly Wings” hits me while standing outside of “Feel Good Inc.”

Never mind that “Razorblade Kiss” that has been pushed up on you. “Push It” out of your mind, because you are “Wonderful Tonight” and always are, now “Lay Down Sally” in the “White Room”, with the walls dripping in sweat from you being up against them, an exciting thought of what I want to do to you every single night, so there’s that constant smell of “Sex and Candy.” The little bit of “Innocence” you have let’s “Paint it Black” to keep it hidden from this “Mind Control” that goes on all around us, they don’t need “Someone To Love”, when they are the “Last of a Dying Breed” and feel “Something From Nothing” while riding with the “Paramedics”, who even know that “911 Is a Joke”, no matter where you go.

I think that it’s “Over Now”, because I think that you would be “Better Off” with a noose made of barbed wire and diamonds around your neck, hanging above a “Hole in the Earth.” Trying to find a “Balance” within yourself as your last breath escapes you and your world goes black.

We’ve got “Footage” of us in the form of memories, memories that last, but the moments were so “Haste.” The love was never any “Real Love”. Looking at the “Change” in you has had me on my knees standing up for what I believe in, while my hands were tied and tears streaming down my face. One must “Never Surrender” when face with adversities, is what I keep telling myself over and over again. Just keep pushing forward because I will be a “Survivor” and make you want to “Talk About It’ with all of the “Beautiful People.” Nothing will ever be the same again now that I’ve reached “Heaven” and I’ve come to find out it’s a living hell.

Now I no longer feel “So Alone” since realizing “The Beauty of Gray.” It’s time to “Take the Power Back” so I promise that “I’ll Stick Around” to see everything that you are going to do. While “Staring at the Sun” and still never seeing the light.